3 Reasons Why I am Over Oktoberfest

13 Oct

I obviously LOVE to travel. Any chance I get I am researching new places to visit, moving obligations around in my busy schedule to squeeze out an extra few days of travel time in between priorities. But sometimes, I just want to be home. and then there are always those weekend trips that make you so happy to be back home in your own, warm bed, happy to have left for the weekend but even happier to be back home. After taking dozens of trips and mini-vaca’s I have found that one of my favorite parts of my adventure is finding myself back in my own bed, content in knowing that I have finally found the perfect city to call home.

This leads me to the topic of Munich’s famed Oktoberfest. Oh boy do I love this festival: Beer, chocolate covered fruit, rides, food, potatoes, hundreds of drunk Germans singing in German. Everything about it really is just fantastic. But after my 3rd trip to Oktoberfest, while I was unable to sleep, shivering in my tent in the freezing cold, listening to dozens of drunk Australians carrying on about God knows what, I realized… wow, I am so over this. It took a lot of self restraint to not pack up my bag, wake up my friend and book it to the nearest 5-star hotel (My friend, Vanessa, would of course have been delighted to run to more luxurious accommodations, neither of us are really cut out for the camping thing). So here are the three reasons why I will not be returning to the land of beer anytime soon:


1. While I ADORE Germany, I’ve already visited 4 times. Enough is enough! Been there, done that. This also goes for Oktoberfest, once you’ve seen it, its not that special anymore. I can drink overpriced beers and eat shitty over priced German food anywhere I want (yankee stadium comes to mind here).

I guess €10 is actually a pretty good deal in this case..

2. I’ve realized that I’m just too old for this shit. Camping? Cold? Dirty, shared showers? SPIDERS? Thanks, but NO. When I camped out in Munich three years ago I had the time of my life. The dirty sleeping bags, critter infested tents and loud, drunk Aussies didn’t bother me one bit, but at the slightly more mature age of 23 I’ve realized that if I am going to take valuable time off school and work I want to enjoy myself. and maybe get a massage.. a massage by a hot European therapist, not a gross German spider. There was actually one point in our trip where I went to grab my shoe from the outside of our tent and flipped a shit when I saw a spider taking a nap in it, I threw the shoe and starting screaming (obviously), I then made my way deeper into our tent to be closer to Vanessa when another spider dropped from the ceiling right in front of our faces… this time we BOTH started screeching like maniacs. When we exited the tent our tent neighbors were standing outside staring at us with blank faces (I’m pretty sure they think we’re nuts). Oh and least I forget to mention… I had to sleep with my pashmina wrapped around my head and face because I was so afraid that my sleeping bag might actually come into contact with my skin and I would develop some crazy German form of scabies and DIE.


3. I am now deathly ill. So, four short days after returning home from this wonderful weekend getaway, I have fallen ill. Runny nose, migraines, clogged ears the whole nine yards. and who is to blame for this horribleness? Yup, you guessed it. Fucking Oktoberfest. Well, more accurately the CAMPING at Oktoberfest. Why I thought I was cut out for camping is lost on me, but rest assured that my next trip will be done the right way… warm beds, hot showers and critter-less accommodations.

Chocolate covered fruit makes me happy

This doesn’t.

So in conclusion, while Oktoberfest is one of the greatest festivals on earth, and I did have another amazing time celebrating German beer with my amazing friend, 3 trips there might be considered “overkill”. Now i’m off to eat my feel good soup and drink my wonderfully steamy mint tea…



One Response to “3 Reasons Why I am Over Oktoberfest”

  1. Ally October 15, 2012 at 2:45 pm #

    “When I camped out in Munich three years ago I had the time of my life.”

    Hmm I wonder why?? A little german accomplice named Ally comes to mind…

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